Wednesday, November 03, 2010

Truths for Mature Adults

I found this somewhere a month or so ago and now I can't remember where....so can't credit the original author but it says it all.

TRUTHS FOR MATURE ADULTS

1) I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2) Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3) I totally take back all the times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4) There is a great need for a sarcasm font.

5) How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6) Was learning cursive really necessary?

7) Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my own neighborhood.

8) Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9) I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10) Bad decisions make good stories.

11) You never know when it will strike but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12) I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my 10 page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

13) I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

14) I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

15) I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

16) I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

17) How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

18) I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

19) Even under ideal conditions people have trouble finding their car keys in a pocket or a cell phone. I bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

20) The first testicular guard, the "Cup" was used in hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is important too.


Just sayin'....

21 comments:

heartinsanfrancisco said...

This is great, Maria! I especially like 8 and 20. Which ones are your favorites?

Kelsi said...

I'd say these are truths for "young" adults as well - I'm 18, and the only one on here that I can't relate to is 18 (coincidence?), because I am just not capable of operating a motor vehicle. Maybe someday =]

K

poet said...

#5, i actually can do this pretty well....as long as i have a flat surface and the cats stay out of my way.
the rest of these are awesome tho. have a GREAT evening. poet.

HaS the Turtle said...

tooo funny!!!! lol number 19! number 2 and number 5

the only daughter said...

Love these: 2, 7, 17, 20 and of course, 10.

lol.

Velvet Sacks said...

These are great! The person who wrote this has a real talent for summarizing thoughts we all have but seldom devote any attention to.

Eric said...

These are all great, found myself nodding along with all of them.

KMae said...

Love 18!

LL Cool Joe said...

Ha ha, love the list, and I totally agree with number 18.

C said...

bwahahahahaha i love it! specially #20!

sounds like you are feeling better- GOOD.

lemme know when or if you ever try that cupcake shop...

c

Rose said...

Love these!

But I actually *do* know how to do #5, and do it quickly and well. That's what 15 years as a massage therapist will do for you!

Kym said...

These are awesome!!

e said...

What a hilarious list! So, so true! And, yes, Lisa, please come over and clear my cache when I'm gone...

Calm said...

number five is so, so true. love it!

This Mom said...

I LOVE this list! I may have to borrow it for my blog too.

Terroni said...

Re: #15 ...but then I'd never be able to get out of Baltimore.

Heather said...

I always giggle at #7 because the map thing only starts from the spot YOU put in, so if you know how to get out of your neighborhood...enter the starting point from where you DON'T know where you're going. Duh!

I know. I know. Common sense is lost on some folks. Easier to say it's the application that is stupid. (Where's that sarcasm font when I really need it?) ;)

Texas2Tennessee said...

Bad decisions make good stories. I'm borrowing that and running with it!

abhinavbharat said...

it was really wonderful

i couldn't help but laugh loud on several of them, the pitch increasing as it went along...

thanks a ton

Snooker said...

Awesome, and I have to tell you that I simply must steal it.

sister AE said...

EK-CELL-LENT!!

love 'em.