It has been hard for me to feel so...naked in front of all of my real life and Blogville friends lately. Many of you have written to me telling me that you love the way I "lay it all out there" or how I am "so genuine."
The truth is that I don't really lay it all out there and while I may be genuine, I am not always forthcoming. I don't want to write about my illness. I want to overcome it and THEN write about it. I write as honestly as I am able about my personal life to a certain degree and the rest I keep kindly to myself. I think that my partner, Bing, and my best friend, Harriet are the only ones in the world who have access to the total package of me. And why they aren't running away in the opposite direction is amazing to me. Liv knows me very well too, but as her parent, I protect her from the worst parts of myself. I strive to be the best role model that I can for her. It is probably the one perfectly unselfish thing I have done in my entire life, protecting her. Behaving myself for the love of her.
I have been receiving so many good wishes e-mails and thoughts and posts lately and I must say that they touch me to the core.
I have felt so...uplifted by all of you. So, thank you to those of you who have been there for me even though I stipulated that I did not want sympathy. I haven't really felt that awkward sympathy from anyone. Mostly, I just felt sort of taken in hand, patted gently.
And for that, I thank you. It has meant a lot to me to have such a group of people who have never met me, make such an easy bridge for me to pass over. How did I ever get so lucky to have this eclectic, funny, smart, generous, kind, weird ass, loudly quiet, diverse group of people looking out for me and reaching across the miles to let me know that I wasn't alone?
Thanks for making me snicker and laugh and feel looked after. But, mostly thank you for just letting me be myself and liking me fine just the same.
Okay, I don't want to pull a Sally Field here ("You like me! You really like me!") If you will allow me one small gesture of gushiness, I would be appreciative.
So..with that in mind, this one's for all of you.
Thank you. From the bottom of my heart.
19 comments:
:)
Your writing is rich and full of soul. Any withheld specifics do not detract from the overall effect, which is stunning and real.
No, Thank You.
Peace.
(o)
Of course we like you, you silly girl ;)
Thank you for sharing all you do of yourself.
Love this video and song too, Alanis is one of my favorite singers.
Peace.
I love Alanis because she's quirky and unique and writes wonderful songs.
You're kinda the same!
You deserve all the good things
i haven't left a lot of comments but have just been enjoying you writing again after taking a break. abba is a guilty pleasure of mine, but only because of my sister linda. we'd dance in the theatre with you if we were there.
and i doooooo like you. i really really like you!
x0
cg
Oh, just what I needed, Alanis naked and wailing, thank you.
It doesn't matter that we don't know all of you. What little I know, I like and admire. When you write about yourself, it's easy to pick and choose, to leave out the parts that are too painful and revealing. I do the same. My blog shows a side of me that many people do not see, but at the same time, it conceals a lot about who I am.
Seding wishes for your health and recovery.
I guess I knew all that Maria dear. And we not only like you, we are fans of your writing. But your subject matter is not incidental to us, it is comforting in its "ordinariness" I don't mean that in a derogatory way at all. It is that which makes us all fallible and human.
I've been trying to comment but our lines keeping dropping out. Optus is having some big problems I think.
Anyway, it is us who should be thanking you.
And I loved the Harriett movie story - I always knew I liked her. It seems so plain to me why she would be your bff.
Much love and hugs for you to get better. xxxxx
I agree...thank YOU for being there. and i remember that you were the FIRST person to comment on my blog...back when i was on blogger...and are still here with me still... amazing...
Well, I put it all out there. But that is just me. I don't talk about the little things that ail me, mostly I just ignore them and go on with my life.
But I do think that the last thing I will blog about will be about my dying. I find this so called dying interesting.
Couldn't get most of the words in the video but she had wonderful hair.
Lets see, something gushy. I gushed yesterday and may again today, but I just wipe it off with an old tee shirt. Whacking off is a no brainer... LOL
Is it wrong that I always wonder what exactly she is on antibiotics for whenever I hear that song, even though I'm fairly certain the answer would leave us right smack dab in the middle of TMI territory?
Hmm...looks like blogger is failing to recognize me yet again...I hope this makes it through...
You are so right. You have an eclectic, so on and so on group here.
Because...your writing is funny and honest and...uplifting to us.
You reap what you sow.
Well, I won't gush, because bbc has already done so. Yesterday and maybe today.
Gina and I are gonna drive out the Omaha and take you to lunch.
Get dressed!
No, thank you...
Maria,
Thank you. You never fail to inspire me. The fact that you write about your life, and most things you write about are things that the majority of us can and do relate to is what makes your writing the best out there. I so respect you, your life, and your ability to express it so eloquently, while at the same time causing a fit of giggles or a mountain of tears. You remind me so much of one of my favorite authors, "Anne Tyler". Your wit, your fun, your ability to see your life for what it is.
So my friend, thank you for sharing it with us.
Peace,
OC
this connection we all have over the miles never ceases to amaze me...it isn't anything you can explain. i am glad that we can be supportive and loving without oozing sugar out our edges.
I just know that you are certainly someone that i would love to share air with sometime...if i'm ever in Nebraska or if you're ever in Texas.
I find you an amazing sort of human and i'm very thankful that we've 'met.'
and thank you for your thank you. that is one of my favorite alanis songs.
I think it should be me thanking you. Thank you. You don't realize how I needed to read what you wrote. Thank you!
While I don't get to stop by and read as often as I'd like, I do appreciate the level of openness in which you write. I, on the other hand, do what I can to keep my heart well covered. Maybe someday I can be as true to myself as you are on my blog.
You are an inspiration, Maria, which is why you are able to reach people so well.
Anytime, Maria. Anytime.
p.s. Why did this post just today pop up in my reader? Weird!
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